Friday, May 13, 2011

light vs. light

I had a vision the other night in prayer.
It was of a room, buzzing with obnoxious florescent lights. Then all of the sudden the room just went black for a few seconds. Then out of the blackness came one calm, glowing, single flame. Shortly after I found this verse.

Revelation 21:23 The city doesn't need any sun or moon to give it light, because the glory of God gave it light, and the lamb was its lamp.

I believe God spoke this to me to give me a taste of what is to come. The world has a false idea of what light is, therefore they have no need for the single flame. Until there is no light, will we ever have a grasp of the value of the one true single flame; the only everlasting glory that the world will one day see.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

When I am weak, He is made strong

This may sound a little out of the ordinary, but God has been speaking to me a lot about confirmation. So many times we can get caught up in decisions, big decisions, that will change our life. We go over them again and again and again in our minds. Pro's and con's, pro's and con's pro's and con's. Pro's or con's? We can see the same thing in two totally different lights. How we look at it will change everything, that's what's so scary sometimes. It's like you can't really trust yourself because your opinion about the decision is always changing. A new pro comes into factor, a new con. We as Christians are very familiar with this mind process. So we look for confirmation from God in different ways to give us clarity on where He is leading through our leaders, a bible verse, friends, a sentence some random person spoke to you that happened to somehow subliminally mention your circumstance.

I personally get a little too caught up in this sometimes. Too often I am asking God for confirmation and rarely am I finding it in my time of prayer. I've been too concerned with the form of confirmation instead of with God's opinion and His heart.

I feel like I might not be the only one who is guilty of this. How many times do we seek approval from everyone else, seek opinions and counsel from everyone but God. 

When I realized what I was doing, I honestly became completely disinterested in my "big decisions." I didn't care. I don't care. God's presence and His voice are so much more valuable than even my plans or His plans for me. It was then and only then that clarity came.

Because in my weakness, He is made strong.

Hey Anelisse,

    It's great to hear what you're doing in order to fund raise and how you have high goals. I love all the creative ideas! A good amount for you to come to DTS in September would be 2,000 Euros. But if you don't have that, that is totally fine. We absolutely believe here in YWAM Herrnhut that if God has called you to come do a school with us, HE WILL PROVIDE AT ALL COSTS! I came to DTS with only 100 euros in my pocket and I was able to see God provide in miraculous ways for my outreach and lecture phase. I took a step in faith knowing  that "I'm supposed to be here" and God saw that and provided. So Anelisse, don't let money control your life or decisions. If you feel like God is sending you here, then come! Get a plane ticket and simply come. We have prayed over your application and we truly felt like you should be here for this time. Please think about these things and reflect why God has directed you here. Money is not bigger than God; God is the creator of money and has all the money in the world He can freely give to you.

 - Taylor M. Pool

Please consider supporting me this Fall through prayer, finances, or encouragement.
I'm so blessed to have such an amazing opportunity.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Acts is blowing my mind right now.

(Acts 5:29-39)Peter and the apostles answered, "It's necessary to obey God rather than men. The God of our ancestors raised up Jesus, the One you killed by hanging him on a cross. God set him on high at his side, Prince and Savior, to give Israel the gift of a changed life and sins forgiven. And we are witnesses to these things. The Holy Spirit, whom God gives to those who obey him, corroborates every detail."
 33-37When they heard that, they were furious and wanted to kill them on the spot. But one of the council members stood up, a Pharisee by the name of Gamaliel, a teacher of God's Law who was honored by everyone. He ordered the men taken out of the room for a short time, then said, "Fellow Israelites, be careful what you do to these men. Not long ago Theudas made something of a splash, claiming to be somebody, and got about four hundred men to join him. He was killed, his followers dispersed, and nothing came of it. A little later, at the time of the census, Judas the Galilean appeared and acquired a following. He also fizzled out and the people following him were scattered to the four winds.
 "So I am telling you: Hands off these men! Let them alone.

If this program or this work is merely human, it will fall apart, but if it is of God, there is nothing you can do about it

and you better not be found fighting against God!"

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

lol i found some really old "about me" facts and i thought it'd be funny to post. i hope this doesn't seem too egocentric but i mean, it is a blog :)

1. without my glasses i can't see clearly past arms length
2. i love reading.
3. if i see someone crying, i usually cry too. even if it's on tv
4. when i was little i used to scratch my skin when it was ashy so i could be white.
5. i would also draw pictures of myself and color myself peach. even if there was a tan crayon
6. will farrel is a genius
7. i get dizzy when i think about the universe and "infinity"
8. i am fascinated by childhood
9. i hope to be half the woman my mom is one day
10. i always wonder if everyone has their own set of colors they see
11. i love change. i'm going to live in atleast 4 or 5 different states/countries before i settle down
12. when i sing my voice kindof sounds like a mix of miranda lambert and mariah carey
13. it's impossible to stay mad at me.. unless i'm mad at you too
14. music is one of the many ways to my heart
15. most people think i'm unrealistic. but i don't care, that motivates me even more
16. if you tell me no, i will say yes
17. i'm going to save the world

1. i'm really mean when i get in a bad mood. feed me and i'll be just fine
2. i hate the combination of cold and windy. and i always think walking backwards will somehow make me less cold
3. i hate it when people wave at me from far away. i NEVER know who i'm waving to because i can't ever see. or if the person was even waving at me? it makes me so nervous
4. i am drawn to people who are completely themselves and original.even if i have absolutely nothing in common with them
5. i plan to take a pastry making class one day. i know it'll come in handy
6. hate sneezing. love yawning
7. no matter how much i complain about how annoying and protective my family is, they are some of the few people who TRULY understand me
8. i blowdry my whole body in the mornings so i can be warm
9. i've learned a lot about forgiving. it's the hardest but best thing you can do for yourself and whoever is involved.
10. i have a bad habit of asking really personal questions.
11. i roll my eyes big time at people who try too hard to fit in.
12. a perfect day to me would be going to barnes and noble and sitting in the corner all day just reading different things.
13. i love laying on peoples stomachs and listening to all the noises. it really really makes me laugh
14. i have a boy's sense of humor
15. my little brother's hugs and kisses could heal anyone's heart.
16. i want to dedicate my life to a good cause. whether it earns me a lot of money or not.
17. i've set my microwave on fire.. three times.
18. i'm really bad at keeping in touch with people and i seriously hate it
19. for some reason i never think the rules apply to me
20. i'm happy being imperfect.
21. i'm really ungraceful. especially when i concentrate really hard on being graceful
22. i love oblivious people who have no idea how funny they are

NINE things about yourself:
1. I'm so so happy. Just naturally.
2., I will never turn down a chance to try something new
3. I try to only come home when it's absolutely necissary
4. If you don't give me some space I will run and hide from you
5. I tell it like it is
6. I love chicken alfredo with penne noodles
7. I know that I work too much because I dream about it almost every night
8. I won't let you get too close
9. I'm ready to be out of Wylie

EIGHT ways to win your heart:
1. Be yourself
2. Don't lose your temper with me
3. Let me meet your friends
4. Cook for me
5. Hug me really tight
6. Ask me personal questions
7. Get along with my friends
8. Don't be clingy

SIX things that cross your mind a lot:
1. Texas state<3
2. Money
3. Friends
4. Work schedule
5. My birthday
6. I miss Kayla

SIX things you do before you go to bed:
1. Change
2. Eat
3. Wash my face
4. Watch a lil TV
5. Play a lil bubble breaker
6. Plug my phone in

FIVE ways you want to be remembered.
2. Selfless
3.Free spirited

FOUR songs that fit you.
1. Use somebody - Kings of leon
2. Push - Matchbox 20
3. She talks to angels - Black Crows
4. Free Fallin - John Mayer

TWO things you want to do before you die:
1. Go on a long term missions trip
2. Be a mom

ONE confession:
1. I can't picture myself being married.

what a depressing note to end on haha. i was such a happy camper before Jesus.

pause not

Friday, April 22, 2011

The time is now

"Ask yourself whether the dream of heaven and greatness should be waiting for us in our graves - or whether it should be ours here and now and on this earth."
-Ayn Rand

I really love this quote. It's a reality we need to hear. Sometimes I find myself looking over everything God has called me to be - a leader, a teacher, an artist, an example and I tell myself that I'm not any of those things yet. I need more training. I need more practice. I need more experience. But what I am hearing God say more and more lately is this:

"You are a leader. You are a teacher. You are an artist. You are an example."

What I've been doing without even realizing it is looking for things I can do that will qualify me to accept what God says I am. Who am I to tell God that I am not what He said I am yet? No. If He is calling me to be something, I am exactly that! There is nothing in my own humanly power I can do that will make me more of what He says I am.

2 Corinthians 6:2 For God says, "At just the right time, I heard you. On the day of salvation, I helped you." Indeed, the "right time" is now. Today is the day of salvation.

God is in the midst of raising up an army. You will see Him moving if you open your eyes. Don't miss out on it. And thank God that when He says something, it's not up to you to fulfill it. It's already fulfilled. Walk in His promise.

Monday, April 18, 2011

I've spent a lot of my life trying to find something I'm good at. Why couldn't I just be content with who I was during all my awkward stages?! I have no idea. I was probably much cooler than I gave myself credit for.

However, for some reason I felt the need to search for affirmation through outlets other than my bike riding skills. So I exhausted myself trying to channel Mia Hamm as I sprinted up and down the soccer field. I'd  write over the top emo poems to catch my audience's attention. I wanted to be the best in shot put, basketball, volleyball, poll vaulting, track, softball, and cheerleading. For so many reasons I wanted to prove to myself one thing, that I could do it. But instead the opposite happened. I got a black eye from softball and they ended up just making me the manager /ball retriever. In cheerleading, my bases didn't catch me and I took a pretty hard fall that scarred me for life. Practice for poll vaulting started at 6 am. So needless to say, that didn't last. Pretty much I failed miserably in all these things.
But one starry night, my right hand met a paintbrush. The instant connection they had is magical to recall upon. In the next few months they became inseperable, sitting under trees, admiring the scenery, and talking for hours.

They let their imagination sweep them away and dreamt of a land where wild animals lived and played among them.

It didn't take long for that to become a reality.

As time went on they began to kindle a deep and sincere love for eachother. It was no longer just an attraction. This was real.

A love so precious and delicate that the only way to hold, without crushing it, is to let it get swept away with wherever the wind is taking it.

Thank you Jesus for giving me a creative mind. For without it I would be miserably bored and by now, on the verge of insanity.